Updated: Apr 12
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Do you ever look around and think, "How did I get here?" Surely we have all said this before. Sometimes it's in the middle of a shit storm, or the ending of something. Or perhaps you were shaken by jolting awareness, quickly seeing the whole picture, whole truths are download and there is no going back in the direction you came from. Maybe you've been divinely awakened. Your story needs to change and you can see that now. The tides have shifted. You almost didn't have a choice. Other times, life does it for you. Your spouse leaves, a parent dies,
you get fired, or sick, and your perspective changes.
We also most definitely have looked around and marveled in wonder at the brilliance of perfect timing, manifestation realization, our whole being rejoicing, for it is on path and on purpose. I hope that most people feel this majority of the time.
Sometimes the soul's voice is loud, and other times it is a small and soft whisper; you lean in to hear clearly. For some, the compass of the soul has been loud since day one. For others, it takes practice to learn the language of the soul. And some choose to ignore it altogether.
I have seen so many people I know, decide consciously or unconsciously not to follow their soul's purpose. Risking the comfort they hold so dear, was too unbearable. Starting over or switching gears, is not easy. So some stay in jobs they hate, in toxic relationships, and they give up their wants and passions, only to yearn always for the life they truly desire. All in the name of comfort and fear.
I know people that would have made fabulous writers and educators, but because they couldn't see value or worth in it or themselves, they eventually were separated from their god-given gifts through lack of engagement. Dwindling faith in the transformative power of purpose and the daily grind leads to self-doubt on autopilot. If you don't use it, you lose it. We were meant to engage with our gifts.
No matter your circumstances, there is a way to live the life you were meant to live.
Now being in your purpose, doesn't mean you'll have everything you want, but it can mean that. I think it means that we live with an embodied richness, free to express ourselves in a true and honest, creative way, unique to us; this freedom and alignment supports universal evolution as well. How could it not, as we are all connected by the great ecosystem of life.
A naturally happy and smiley person may be living their purpose one smile at a time, uplifting all who feel the warmth of that radiant smile. No divine purpose is too small. I think there is a misconception that if you are in your purpose, you will be famous or well known for what you do. I think this is far from true. In the age of social media, young people think fame means being in your purpose. And everyone claps for you. When in reality being in your purpose may position you to get very little accolades, it may work out that the lack of praise, humbles you further, and your work is better because you had to learn how to praise yourself.
Today I looked around and thought, "How did I get here?" But most delightfully. I am doing exactly what I should be doing. I am where I should be, and I can tell you how I got to be on path and on purpose...I risked it all! The yearning was too loud for me to ignore. I wasn't going to feel disconnected and like I was living the wrong life. I left it all. Sold it all. Quit life as I knew it. Letting go of my house was the hardest. I loved it so much. Walking away from a successful business seemed insane from the outside in, and many told me so. But I couldn't listen to the yearning for one more day. I was going to risk it all to follow the bread crumbs and hunches, of my soul. Thank God my husband felt it was the right thing for him as well. We set out on a grand adventure, us, our two pugs, two bunny rabbits, in our R.V. It took more courage than I knew I had. With no plan and the open road, we became students of life. We found a flow in divine timing, and let our intuition point the way. We initiated ourselves onto the path of the great unknown.
I listened deeply to my soul every day and watched for the bread crumbs my soul had laid out for me. I died a thousand ego deaths, with a lifetime of that to go still, I am sure. I found a way through the horrendous fear that says, "No, I can't, I am too scared." I had the gift and misfortune of having my Dad die when I was eight. You see I learned very quickly that life is short. You got to do what you were designed to do or life will feel like you're 10 pounds too heavy for those pants you are wearing. You may even try to fix everything around you to feel like you, but nothing external will cut the yearning to merge with your destiny. It is strong! It is evolution calling you, and if you are too scared to show up to your evolution, well you may always feel like something is missing.
It's been four years since selling it all and hitting the road as nomads. So much has happened since we left our comfortable lives behind.
Today the sun is shining, the wind dancing through my hair, and the trees, inspiring freedom, and reflection. My gumboots are dirty with aged cow manure, my seeds are starting to germinate. And my spiritual practice is to show up every day committed to the soul's path of evolution.
I dreamed of this location, where I live now, without even knowing where it was. The intention was set, and I wasn't afraid to ask the universe for what felt like alignment. And how could it not be, I was meeting my soul and its vision for me; I was meeting it halfway. It is like that old saying, "What you're seeking is also seeking you." Rumi said that I think.
If you look at life from that point of view, that that which you are seeking is seeking you, then it gets harder to choose comfortable unconsciousness. We can choose to wake up to the degree in which we were meant to, at that moment, leaning heavily in the direction of risk, and evolution because we know it is far too painful to ignore the soul in the long term. Ignoring yourself fractures the relationship to intuition, our ability to self-trust. We have to shut down a part of ourselves to live a life we weren't meant to. I truly feel this is where most depression comes from. People are trying to convince themselves that the life they are leading is enough for them. Maybe if they buy another new car, a bigger house, and acquire more, they will finally be happy. The consumer lifestyle is a bottomless pit swirling with hungry ghosts. Nothing will feed you like listening to the call of your own soul. Sometimes it's hard to hear. Life is not a piece of cake. Life is noisy and demanding, and the rent/mortgage needs paying. The grind will grind down almost anyone.
The opposite of grind is growth.
What are you willing to risk, to grow in the ways that were meant for you?
In healing and revolution,