Succeed Without Fear & Heal That Old Impostor Syndrome - Mindful Cuddles Session 8
Updated: Feb 28
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In order to get the best results please find a quiet place where you can focus your attention and intention towards the goals of this recording.
This recording is intended to be listened to and shared widely with the public and therefore should be seen as non-clinical / non-therapeutic hypnosis and is defined as the use of hypnosis to instill positive thinking and the capacity for self-hypnosis.
This recording is intended to be educational in nature, providing information, instruction, support and encouragement. If you would like to experience deep trance hypnosis as part of therapeutic sessions please book time at nourishvictory.com
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My name is Laura McGregor and I’m a Clinical Hypnotherapist at Nourish Victory.
Perhaps for some time you’ve felt like, any day now, you’re going to be found out and exposed as a fraud, or that people around you believe you’re more competent than you actually are. It could be that you feel your successes have only been down to good luck, rather than to your actual talent and skills, and if people only knew what you were like, deep down, they’d see that you are a fake. Or perhaps it may be that you have experienced a certain reluctance to embark on new projects or try to do things that you feel are outside your comfort zone. Maybe you do actually participate but are constantly held back by a conviction in the back of your mind that you are going to fail in many of the things you attempt. Perhaps this fear has been preventing you from striving towards achieving your goals - and even when you do succeed - it is as though you really didn’t expect it to work out - perhaps you even think it was just a fluke.
Interestingly, people who really are imposters, the kind of people who boldly use fake qualifications and charm to bluff their way into a high-status job they are totally unqualified for, usually feel very little self-doubt or insecurity, and often have an elevated sense of their own entitlement.
It’s also very useful to remember that people who are truly incompetent at their job are typically oblivious to that fact. In a series of experiments at Cornell University in nineteen ninety-nine, researchers found that the poorest performers on any given task are actually less able to notice their incompetence and that they have a mistaken belief in their own superiority. In contrast, the people in those experiments who were the most capable and skilled were more prone to self-doubt and tended to underestimate and undervalue their own abilities.
The truth is, we all go through periods in life where we’re a complete beginner at something, where we’re just finding our feet in a new job or in a new environment, and it’s perfectly normal to feel like a fish out of water who’s expected to climb trees in times like that. But a more subtle form of imposter syndrome can also occur in people even when they’ve been working in their field for many years.
For example, stop right now and make a fist with your right hand. Squeeze it tightly for a moment, and then open your hand again.
Good. Now, if I asked you to tell me in words how you did that, to describe exactly what you did to move the fingers and the thumb, how you willed each muscle, joint and tendon to take up the positions that they did so that your hand went from being open to being curled into a tight fist and then opening out again, and how you were able to carry out this complicated manoeuvre so quickly and easily, you’d have trouble giving me an intelligible answer. You just did it. For you, it was no big deal.
In the same way, people who have developed deep, intuitive skills in any activity or field of work often have great difficulty knowing how they do it. So even after you’ve been working in a field for many years, it’s easy to worry that you’re somehow just winging it. Whereas the reality is much more likely to be that over time you’ve developed skills and abilities that are so natural and intuitive to you, that you simply don’t appreciate any more how hard those skills and abilities would be for someone else to learn.
If your intention is to fall into a deep and sound sleep please be sure your alarm clock is set. Go ahead and place yourself in a comfortable position. Adjust your body so that you’re lying, with your legs and feet uncrossed and slightly apart, hands resting loosely in your lap.
And If I have your permission to guide you into a calm and relaxing state then just begin by taking some deep, comfortable breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth.
And of course, as always you have the power to Accept or Reject suggestions as you hear them. You can practice this in everyday life when you hear something on television or during regular everyday conversations. And of course, you have the power to accept or reject any suggestions that you hear tonight. Please use these two powerful gifts as often as possible. Doubling down on things that resonate with your values and integrity by internally thinking “I accept that suggestion” and quickly rejecting anything that doesn’t “I reject that suggestion”.
And as you begin to relax I’ll bring your awareness to any sounds, just everyday sounds around your house, people or dogs in the background, perhaps cars passing by in the neighbourhood and these sounds do not bother or disturb you, as a matter of fact, they help you relax even more comfortably. And of course, at any time should you need to awaken, you can do so quickly and effortlessly.
Now as you prepare to relax very deeply you can just close those eyes if you haven’t yet and as you follow along comfortably to the sound of these words and breathe smoothly and easily
I’d like you to begin to pretend that you know how to make a fist
not just with one hand but with both hands at the same time
and you can do that right now
that’s it curl the fingers inwards squeeze both those hands into fists
as you get a real sense of faking it of pretending that this is something you know how to do
And next as you pretend you know how to squeeze those fists even more tightly I’d like you to begin to pretend you don’t know how to open those fists just fake not knowing how to open those hands that’s it and then as you take a slow deep breath in and breathe out smoothly and evenly you can let all of that go you can release the hands allow the fingers to unfurl and really begin to allow yourself to settle comfortably more and more easily and effortlessly into rest and comfort more and more deeply with each and every breath that’s it
And sometimes as you listen to these words you might find yourself really having fun pretending that on the outside you’re relaxing deeply that you’re softening the muscles of the face that you’re loosening the muscles of the neck that you’re allowing the shoulders to relax more and more comfortably with each and every breath while on the inside you secretly stay watchful and alert aware of every sound around you as you pretend to relax the arms the hands the fingers twice as relaxed that’s it and relax the legs the feet the toes allowing that body to feel comfortably heavy while inside you remain secretly totally watchful and alert
And other times as you listen to these words you can really have fun pretending that you’re visibly alert and awake on the outside while secretly invisibly on the inside you’re drifting deeper and deeper into a state of total calm and inner rest a wonderfully enjoyable dreamlike reverie floating only into times of enjoyment satisfaction comfort and ease maybe times in your life when you were doing something you loved to do or a time you were in a place where you felt so wonderfully at ease completely comfortable in your own skin free to be just you expressing yourself naturally being yourself that’s it
The way someone can go on a walk through a beautiful landscape with views stretching out to the horizon perhaps rolling hills and lush valleys perhaps water glittering in the sunlight
and the way that kind of landscape allows you to feel nourished and uplifted and you can really notice how a tree you pass as you walk along grows unselfconsciously unquestioningly simply being the tree that it is sending down roots deep into the earth drawing up nourishment from the ground and stretching its branches out to the sky its leaves basking in the sunlight and there’s a deep quiet a silence patience within that tree which allows it to simply be the tree that it is and to do what it does with a calm steadfast undistractable determination and focus
And beneath and behind any of those old worry thoughts that had been cluttering up your mind in the past there is always this same deep quiet silence and patience allowing you to go into flow to draw on all of your instinctive intuitive strengths and abilities with calm steadfast
undistractable determination and focus
Because of course the truth is opening and closing your hands isn’t something you need to fake
you instinctively know how to do it just as you instinctively know how to take a slow deep breath
and how to genuinely honestly relax all the way down now as you slowly and smoothly breathe out
body relaxing genuinely honestly
mind calming settling down becoming more and more still inside as you enjoy this space opening up within the space between and around the thoughts the space and the silence that’s always here beneath and behind these words
body twice as relaxed now
mind twice as calm now
any thoughts in that mind becoming a quiet distant whisper fading away into the distance allowing you to simply be to simply breathe to simply be here now relaxing and letting go all the way down
And a colleague of mine said to me just the other day once you reach a certain age you realise that you’re not wonderful and you’re not terrible you’re just multi-faceted there are so many different aspects to who you are
you have strengths and weaknesses
talents and quirks
deep knowledge of some things utter ignorance of other things
like all human beings
And over the course of your life there have been
have there not
many things you’ve enjoyed
perhaps things that other people created
music movies books perhaps architecture or works of art where you really appreciated the quality the skill the talent the time and effort that went into their creation
and behind every human achievement from the building of the pyramids in Egypt to the Apollo moon landing
from the symphonies of Beethoven and the plays of William Shakespeare
to the works of any successful person
anyone you’ve ever admired for their confidence their wit
behind every one of these is a multi-faceted human being with private vulnerabilities
moments of self-doubt
and who that person is when with a close family member or who they are last thing on Sunday night before the start of the working week might be very different from who they are when they are in full flow firing on all cylinders shining at their best
because we are all multi-faceted we are all human and your professional role is only ever one dimension of who you are and it’s neither fake nor the complete truth it’s just one facet of you one dimension of you
And it’s also other people’s right to admire your strengths and talents because after you’ve practiced anything for some time even things you learned as a child like learning to walk learning to talk learning to write the letters of the alphabet you practice them over and over and then they drop into the unconscious mind and gradually come to feel like an instinctive ability
and just as a professional tennis player doesn’t know exactly how they hit the perfect shot
and just as a great entrepreneur doesn’t know exactly how they dig deep within to find the drive perseverance and creative vision they need to succeed
so there are aspects to what you do to your achievements that you might not fully appreciate consciously
but you can really become more open now to having empathy for people who admire that facet of your personality
people who pay you a compliment
people who enthuse about a piece of work or a job you’ve done
it’s their right to perceive that truth to notice and appreciate that facet of your personality because you are neither wonderful nor terrible you are multi-faceted
And I’d like you to begin to get a sense of watching a video of the future on a big high definition screen in your mind
noticing a future you on that screen right now who is able to relax to calmly focus
to trust in the unconscious deeply embedded skills you’ve developed over the years
so that now they feel almost as effortless as breathing as effortless as opening and closing your hand
and as you notice that future you getting to work on a project you can get a sense of the quiet focus
the calm clarity allowing that future you to simply get on with doing what they’re doing free from the old clutter of those old worry thoughts
calmly able to trust yourself with a fair balanced even-handed sense of confidence that you have strengths and imperfections like all human beings you’re multifaceted
And just as a tree can unselfconsciously grow and stretch itself deepening its roots strengthening its core
stretching upwards and outwards into the unique tree that it is and has always been
now so you can merge into this calm focused future you
that’s it and experience this ease this calm this clarity now in mind and body trusting in your unconscious mind
no need to consciously know how you open and close your hand you just know and that’s true of so many different strengths and abilities within you and they’re all readily available to you always and in all ways
now that’s it
And you can just get a sense of being in a situation here in the future that would perhaps have made you doubt yourself in the past perhaps a high pressure situation
or perhaps just listening to praise from someone and notice the ease with which you can see the truth of that compliment
or the ease with which you can calmly trust in your intuitive strengths and abilities
and it’s okay to be human and to be imperfect
and it’s also okay to be accomplished and talented
you are multi-faceted and you can really get a sense of responding differently in that future time with ease and calm now
And with the help of your wonderful, creative subconscious mind - you are going to surprise yourself by changing the way that you think and feel about failing.
Instead of doubting your own ability - you will approach all that you do with a feeling of confidence and an expectation that you can - and you will succeed - because you deserve to succeed - in all that you do.
As babies we are all born into this world - we each took our first breath - exercised our lungs and learned how to suckle.
Each one of us gave that first heart-melting smile - and those of us fortunate enough to be physically able - learned how to crawl - took our first steps and eventually walked.